That is one intense little word, Enough. She brings a lot of drama and pain when she travels in the concept of Not Enough. Not Enough is the negative-basis of nearly every person's desire for change, healing, growth, beauty, wanted-ness, validation, self-care, and so much more. Not Enough is a brutal task master, driving us to unreasonable expectations and self-perceptions. She is the spawn of Lack Consciousness, and as such, is cruel, heartless, violently voracious, and above all else, an absolute master liar. She rules Not Good Enough, Not Wise Enough, Not Thin Enough, Not Healthy Enough, Not a Good Enough Parent/ Spouse/ Child/ Employee/ Friend/ or Neighbor...etc.), Not Enough Self Control/ Will Power, Not Loving Enough, Not Tough Enough, Not Good Enough with Boundaries/ Money/ Time/ Energy/ Food/ Resources, etc. Not Good Enough for God to Love, Not Worth Enough to be Bothered With/ Noticed, Not Attractive Enough, Not Enough to be Appreciated/ Enjoyed/ Wanted.
You know there is one banging around inside of you. Take a minute to give it a voice and a name. It probably began in early childhood (though not always), coming on the heels of an event in which our parents or a significant person in our lives was being confronted with their own "Not Enough" and in consequence, didn't have Enough to meet our need. There is a desperate ache in a parental "There is Not Enough for me here, how will I ever manage to be/ give/ do Enough for you?!?" It creates a terrorized There Will NEVER Be Enough, which passes on, seemingly hopelessly, to the next generation.
It is so pervasive, so present in everything, it seems impossible to escape. We medicate and marinate in many substances and thought processes while trying to find relief from Not Enough. We do this because she is utterly foreign to Who We Really Are and contradicts our very soul's essence, a knowledge of which cannot be entirely wiped out by Not Enough. It is rather like a homing beacon, constantly "pinging" with the Truth.
In Christian theology is it the absence of Christ that causes this problem, and the presence of Christ is presented as the only cure. I found some peace here for awhile, but it was not "everlasting" as promised. Being based on a premise of judgment & worth, there are still some gaping Not Enough holes in this concept. I imagine most belief systems and religions have similar pit falls. This is primarily due to attaching Inner Peace & Well-Being to an outside force. It will eventually lead to a place of unsettled dissatisfaction...yet another version of Not Enough. There is never Enough of anything on the outside to make up for the pain of Not Enough on the Inside. This only heals, fills, and overflows, from the flood of Not Enough's polar opposite truth: our own, individual experience with the Love Energy of which we are made. Conscious connection to our own Inner Being and the subsequent immersion in our very own Well-Being energy is the cure. In a nutshell, Love really is The Answer.
The energy which our souls are made of is the ultimate energy of all of Creation, and as such, cannot be divided or separated. We cannot be "lost" or "cut off" from our own Source. we are never seen as unworthy by our Inner Beings, either. Negative emotion is simply the guidance tool to help us recognize when we have chosen a frequency lower than who we really are. Rather than condemn, it invites us to realign and re-adjust.
Most of us have had some kind of programming during our incarnations that erroneously taught us to disbelieve in the Love that lives within us. We are taught that it is selfish and inappropriate to seek after, much less receive, our own internal well of Love. But as we gain new insights and elect to listen more closely to our Inner Guidance System, the momentum of Love increases and begins to sweep out the faulty programming and concepts, restoring us to the innocent Truth we were born with.
This is my Healing Focus in May (2018), to find deeper, more deliberate connection with my Inner Being (I call her IB for short, which feels like EyeBee in my head, lol). I want to be more aware of the subtle, chronically negative thoughts that have been introducing resistance. Because once we identify what we do not want, our Inner Being aligns with what we DO want, which is always, WAY more than Enough. And I want it!
Doesn't that sound delicious? To soak and marinate in More Than Enough? To have absolute knowledge of our Goodness? I'm dedicating 31 days to goosing up my ability to resonate with the Energy of All That Is... because after all, that's Who I Am.
Thanks for stopping by. I wish for you more than enough!
In Joy the Journey my friends.